This week, reaching ten months since the birth has made me think about a few things. I haven't spoken on here about my birth experience, I guess I don't feel ready too which is basically because I didn't have a positive birth experience at all. I worried for quite some time as to what effect the birth would have on me both physically and emotionally. Thankfully the physical pain is beginning to ease now, but I am still left with the emotion and trauma of a negative birth experience.
I am hoping, in time the negativity will leave me, the flashbacks will stop, and the apprehension about having another child will go away. They say time is a healer and I am certainly hoping so.
In the meantime I have applied to view my medical records at the hospital as I feel this will be a neccesary step towards closure. I feel that if I can sit down and read and understand exactly what happened, what went wrong, then I can find inner peace.
Maybe in the not so distant future I will dedicate a page to my Pregnancy and Birth, but for now I will leave it at that.
On a more positive note, I have gotten the greatest gift in the world from the whole experience:
And what more can anyone ask for?